Things people say when they don’t know what to say

“So, are you married?”

“Nope. Not yet.”

“Well, don’t worry too much. You still have time.”

1. I wasn’t worried. But thanks for considering my emotional state.

2. I still have time before what? My ovaries dry up? I’m old and wrinkly and therefore COMPLETELY unattractive to the opposite sex? I still have time before I die? Maybe I don’t. I could die today. Maybe I don’t “still have time.” It’s like there’s this imaginary dateline that you cross and become unmarryable. What age is that exactly?

Bless their hearts.

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