I had convinced myself that you didn’t exist. So much so that the idea of you…the posibility of you hardly ever enter my mind anymore. For quite some time, I had perfected the art of ignoring the warning signs of my less-than-satisfying relationship. I could learn to be content with what I had. Afterall, I was comfortable there. I was known. Expectations were clear. Nevermind what settling could cost me in the long run.
He said he wanted to introduce us. I was hesitant because part of me didn’t want to admit that what I had was less than what I could have. But since I trusted him, I relented.
I agreed to meet you on Saturday morning. He was late, so I sat with you, akward at first. I spent more time glancing around the room and down at my book than really looking at you. I felt conspicuously aware that I was surely accupying someone else’s chair. I took a deep breath, and told myself that I was as good as anyone to be sitting there. Soon, he joined us and began telling me all about you – the good and the bad. I felt like I was the third party in a job interview. I reminded myself that he knew you, and thought enough of me to want good things for me. As the morning played on, I found myself more and more at home with you. By the end of our time together, I was taken. It wasn’t his opinion of you that eventually won me over. It was the warmth and subtle sweetness in what you offered that left you lingering in my mind all weekend. I guess at the end of the day, it isn’t the “list” that matters, but how you made me feel.
I wish you weren’t so far away. I wish we could be together today. I’m glad I will see you again tomorrow.