Anybody get anything good for Christmas?

December 28, 2007

I got one of those noise machines from Brookstone. It has all these relaxation settings.

Rain
Thunderstorm
Celestial (Actually sounds that NASA recorded from Jupiter!)
Summer Evening (one of my favorite sounds of nature!)
White Noise (a must when living with someone with a different schedule.)
Jet Lag (It’s supposed to get your body rhythm back in check after travel.)

Apparently these sounds are supposed to get your brain waves in a certain rhthm so that you can sleep/relax more deeply. I don’t know if it is good science or not, but it sure is nice to always have a rain storm to listen to whenever I want.

And books. I got books!


Thinking ahead a little.

December 26, 2007

Dad and I just watched Amazing Grace. So I think I will name my future son

William Luther Staples TBD

Granted it would take a while to bubble in on the SAT, but I think it carries some weight. Maybe I should have two sons and spread it out a little.

William Staples and Luther Clive.

I know I’m not even dating so it might be a little premature to determine that I will get married or have children or have sons or what they should be named. But then again a girl can never be too prepared.


One of the differences between Jesus and Martin Luther King Jr.

December 22, 2007

Happy Birthday, Jesus.

I was thinking about celebrating the birth of Jesus. It’s something He never told us to do. He certainly never told us to go into debt and live a hurried life in order to make it to everone’s RamaChaunaKwamas party. We see pictures of Him in a manger and angel’s singing, while a few barn animals mill around. But I think if we are focused only on His birth, we are missing the bigger picture.

Now don’t get me wrong. The fact that God Almighty would choose to enter the world as a vulnerable child and not the conquering King that the Jewish people were waiting for is amazing and humbling. I think it deserves quite a bit of reflection. The meekness of our Lord was seen from the beginning. But I think if we stop our thoughts at that, we are missing the point.

What if, on the day we celebrate Martin Luther King, Jr.’s birthday we just looked at pictures of the day he was born. What if speeches were made about how long his mom was in labor or whether or not his father was present. We have a day to honour his birthday because of the way he spent his life changing the lives of others. He saw the need to give his life, quite literally, to the oppressed and mistreated. It is appropriate that we should take time to reflect on his contributions to our nation and the world and to carry on many of his principles.

Likewise, while the coming of The King was so miraculous, spend Christmas thinking about more than a cold stable and a young girl pondering the impossible in her heart. He lived so that we could be spiritually alive. He touched the sick and outcast and gave them their dignity back. He brought life in the midst of death. Most importantly He did what we could not do. He fulfilled the covenant of God and was torn and bruised and crushed for our sin. He took what we deserved because He could and we can’t.

I think it is overwhelming to think that throughout the Gospels, Jesus refers to God as Abba Father. This personal and intimate name meant “daddy.” The only time he doesn’t call God by this name is when He was on the cross and He cried out “My God, why have You forsaken me?” He was cut off from His Father so that we wouldn’t have to be. He was torn from the intimacy with His Abba so that we could have that intimacy.

Not by our hands can we earn this. We bring nothing to Him but our need. And our need is great. And when the Father raised Him from dead, He conquered the power of sin and death to bring us into relationship with Him.

Celebrate that as you bring out the cake and sing “Happy Birthday Jesus.”


Jodi says…

December 22, 2007

Mercy always triumphs over judgement.

Also, someone else said…

All defences are down in light of the Cross.


I’m dreaming of a White Trash Christmas.

December 18, 2007

DANBURY, Conn. — A Danbury woman is facing charges that she groped Santa Claus at the Danbury Fair mall.

Sandrama Lamy has been charged with fourth-degree sexual assault and breach of peace.

Danbury police were called to the mall over the weekend. The mall Santa told police that Lamy had touched him inappropriately while sitting on his lap.

Capt. Bob Myles said police were able to quickly find and identify Lamy because she was on crutches.

Lamy has been released on a promise to appear in court on Jan. 3.

A message seeking comment was left on Lamy’s answering machine Tuesday morning. A woman at that number called back to say “It’s a false report and I don’t have any idea.”

Police are not releasing the name of the man playing Santa, but they said he is 65 and felt badly because children were waiting to see him.

“He was apparently shocked and embarrassed by the whole incident,” Myles said.

“Santa Tim” Connaghan, president of RealSantas.com, teaches hundreds of prospective Santas a year and said he’s never heard of a similar incident, though it’s not unusual for adults to want to pose with Santa.

“I’ve had some very nice ladies sit on my lap,” Connaghan said. “Once in a while they’ll say ‘I hope Mrs. Claus isn’t going to be upset.’ You have to be discreet and kind and say ‘Oh no, she’ll be OK. You can sit here, but only for one photo.'”

A spokeswoman for Cherry Hill Photo, the company that coordinates the Santas for the mall, declined comment Tuesday.


Shat.

December 18, 2007

v. Vulgar Slang
A past tense and a past participle of shit.


Why’s it gotta be a WHITE Christmas?

December 17, 2007

CW: So, Sam, if you could kiss anyone under the mistle toe this year, who would it be? And you can’t say Daniel Craig. It has to be someone you know. My game. My rules.

SG: um, George.

CW: The Abercrombie model?

SG: Nevermind. He would talk.

CW: Well, if it’s not something you would want people to know about…

SG: No. I mean he would talk during it.

CW: Ouch.