Jesus is not Mr. Rogers

March 31, 2008

sam: hey my favorite cheryl! you doin okay?
me: my neck hurts. email forthcoming in 10..9..8…
sam: ok, praying it’s good news!
me: sam, it’s ALWAYS good news.
sam: okay, so the 5 needles were to take a biopsy?
me: one to numb. 4 to take cells. freakin’ sucked!
sam: i’m sorry darlin-i wish i could’ve been there to hold your hand!
me: it’s cool. He was. He really gave me a picture of him sitting up on the counter just watching me with “you can do this” in His eyes. oh, and in the picture, He was in jeans…not a robe. Ha!
sam: nice, i like the Lord in jeans picture
maybe a turtleneck too?
Me: Haaale no. graphic tee
sam: ahhh, God would so be at Sanctuary
and would like my nose stud
me: yeah, he would.
sam: did he have sunglasses on? cause that would’ev ROCKED!
me: don’t be rediculous. we were inside.
sam: like that ever stops bono!
me: damn good point, sam. damn good point. gotta run. I need to keep the job so i can keep my insurance!
sam: later, will be praying!
me: thanks


March 31, 2008

This weekend I saw something that induced the same compulsive eye roll that happens whenever a national news anchor says, “and today, in South Carolina…” That’s never a good sign.

The front was a conversion van. The back was a pick-up truck bed. It can only be described as the vehicular equivalent to a mullet.

(eye roll)

My new phone rings with AC/DC’s Back in Black when Papa or Jho calls.

March 31, 2008

“Nothing like a blues-based metal band from Australia to bring a white Georgia boy and black America together.” – Jho

Baseball and Politics

March 31, 2008

I just watched President Bush throw out the first pitch at the the new Washington Nationals stadium. I was worried that he would get booed. Whether you like his politics or not, it’s just mean when people boo.

CW: Oh, I hope they don’t boo him.

Dad: I wouldn’t worry about it. Liberals don’t watch baseball.

What a weird way to kick me while I’m down

March 28, 2008

Jodi: So how are you doing?

Me: You know. Just doin’ my thing. I haven’t cried in two days.

Jodi: So basically you’re not doing your thing.

And she’s a therapist. People pay her to guide and encourage. They pay her money.

Paige says…

March 25, 2008

The only thing that fights bitterness is gratitude.

I guess that’s why they call it medical “practice”

March 24, 2008

So one doc says I have a cyst. The Radiologist says it’s NOT a cyst. The internet says I have like 3 months to live. Relax, mom. I’m kidding.

But I guess it’s not their fault. It’s not like we give doctors the option to tell us nothing until they are sure. We ask questions in an attempt to self-diagnos. It gives us a feeling of control over the situation.

I wish I knew what questions to ask.